In today’s fast-paced world, many women feel profoundly disconnected from their bodies. We push through exhaustion, override our emotions, and ignore the quiet wisdom our physical selves offer us. But this disconnection isn’t simply a product of modern life; it’s a culmination of generational conditioning, systemic control, and societal narratives that have encouraged women to mistrust their instincts and bodies.

From purity culture to diet culture, patriarchal systems have shaped the way women relate to their physical selves, often leaving them disconnected, burnt out, or even experiencing physical conditions like vaginismus or chronic fatigue. But when we understand the roots of this disconnection—and its impact on the brain and body—we can begin the work of reclaiming our embodied power.

The Historical and Cultural Roots of Disconnection

Purity Culture and the Control of Female Bodies

Purity culture, rooted in patriarchal religious teachings, has long positioned women’s bodies as sources of shame or temptation. Messages like “cover up,” “remain pure,” or “don’t be a distraction” instill the idea that a woman’s physical self is something to be hidden, controlled, or mistrusted. Over time, this creates a deep disconnect between women and their natural instincts—their desires, intuition, and even the simple act of feeling comfortable in their own skin.

Diet Culture and Body Mistrust

Diet culture has compounded this disconnection by teaching women to view their bodies as projects to be fixed. Societal pressure to achieve thinness or “perfection” fosters a cycle of restriction, shame, and self-criticism. The body’s natural signals—like hunger, fatigue, or pleasure—are overridden in pursuit of societal approval. Over time, this leads to disembodiment: a sense of being at war with oneself, rather than in tune with the body’s cues.

Productivity Culture and Burnout

Society’s glorification of “hustle” culture disproportionately impacts women, who often bear the invisible load of caregiving and emotional labour. The expectation to “do it all” forces women to push through exhaustion, ignoring their need for rest and cyclical rhythms. This linear, masculine approach to productivity leaves little room for the natural ebbs and flows of energy that women’s bodies experience, particularly during hormonal cycles.

The Neuroscience of Disconnection

When we consistently override our body’s signals—whether through shame, restriction, or productivity pressures—it fundamentally impacts the brain-body connection.

1. The Stress Response: Chronic disconnection activates the body’s stress response, flooding the brain with cortisol and keeping the nervous system in a state of hypervigilance. Over time, this leads to burnout, anxiety, and physical symptoms like muscle tension, migraines, or digestive issues.
2. The Brain’s Role in Vaginismus: Conditions like vaginismus—involuntary pelvic floor contractions that make intercourse painful—are often linked to the brain-body disconnect. For many women, early messages of shame around sexuality or purity culture create a learned fear response in the brain. The body interprets intimacy as a threat, leading to muscle contraction and pain.
3. Disembodiment and the Nervous System: The nervous system is designed to send signals to keep us safe and balanced. But when women suppress these signals—ignoring hunger, overriding fatigue, or numbing emotions—the brain begins to deprioritize communication with the body. This disconnect can make it harder to recognize when we’re stressed, overwhelmed, or even experiencing physical pain.

In short, societal conditioning not only impacts our beliefs and behaviours but also rewires the way the brain interacts with the body. The result? A loss of trust in our physical selves.

Signs of Disconnection

Many women may not even realize they are experiencing disconnection because it has been so deeply normalized. Here are a few common signs:

• Pushing through exhaustion instead of resting
• Suppressing emotions to avoid judgment or discomfort
• Feeling shame around natural bodily functions (e.g., menstruation, sexuality)
• Feeling detached from physical sensations or desires
• Experiencing burnout, chronic fatigue, or conditions like vaginismus

Reclaiming the Connection: Therapy and Embodiment Practices

The journey back to our bodies is a process of reconnection, self-compassion, and healing. Therapy can play a profound role in this process, offering a safe space to challenge internalized shame, understand the origins of disconnection, and develop a renewed relationship with the physical self.

Here are some steps to begin the work:

1. Develop Body Awareness

Start noticing your body’s signals—hunger, fatigue, tension, or pleasure. Practices like yoga, meditation, and breathwork can help you tune into these cues and respond with compassion.

2. Challenge Internalized Beliefs

Therapy can help uncover the societal messages you’ve internalized about your body. Whether it’s purity culture, diet culture, or perfectionism, challenging these narratives is key to reclaiming self-trust.

3. Reconnect with Cyclical Rhythms

Track your menstrual cycle and notice the natural shifts in energy, mood, and intuition. Honour your body’s need for rest during low-energy phases and celebrate its strength during periods of vitality.

4. Process Trauma and Emotional Pain

For those who experience conditions like vaginismus, therapy can address the underlying emotional and psychological factors. Techniques like somatic therapy, EMDR, and CBT can help release stored trauma and re-establish a sense of safety in the body.

5. Prioritize Rest and Pleasure

Give yourself permission to rest, slow down, and experience joy without guilt. Rest and pleasure are not luxuries—they are essential for healing and reconnection.

The Power of Reconnection

Reconnecting with your body is more than a personal act; it’s a radical reclaiming of power in a society that has taught women to disconnect. When we begin to trust our physical selves—to listen to our bodies’ cues and honour their wisdom—we step into a deeper sense of wholeness and well-being.

Therapy can be a powerful starting point for this journey. At VOX Mental Health, we specialize in trauma-informed care that helps women rebuild trust in their bodies, process the roots of disconnection, and move toward a life that feels aligned and embodied.

Ready to Begin? If you’re ready to explore this reconnection, reach out to our team at VOX Mental Health. Together, we’ll create a safe, supportive space to help you heal, trust, and reclaim your relationship with your body.

‍