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Individual Therapy

Oct 3, 2024

Finding yourself in chronic chaos? It could be 'emotional addiction'.

Emotional addiction involves becoming dependent on certain emotions and the chemicals our brain produces when triggered by them. Often referred to as “hit emotions,” these emotions create a chemical response in the brain that can feel as rewarding as addictive substances, like drugs or gambling.

While emotional addiction is often rooted in early life experiences, it can affect anyone, leading to cycles of self-sabotage and stress. This blog will explore what emotional addiction looks like, how it affects your brain, and the steps you can take to break free from this cycle.

What Does Emotional Addiction Look Like?

Do you find yourself disrupting peace in your life when things feel calm? Maybe you start arguments, dive into dramatic situations, or engage in compulsive habits like doomscrolling. These are clear signs of emotional addiction—when your body and mind seek out stress or chaos to trigger a release of adrenaline and cortisol, even when the situations you create don’t feel good.

Other signs include:

  • A constant need for drama or intense emotions in relationships or daily life.
  • Feeling uneasy or bored when things are stable.
  • Seeking out situations that lead to emotional spikes, even when they cause harm.

If you identify with these patterns, emotional addiction may be influencing your behavior.

The Neuroscience of Emotional Addiction

At the core of emotional addiction lies the brain's reward system, which operates on chemicals like dopamine, cortisol, and adrenaline. When you experience a strong emotional response, the brain releases stress hormones, like cortisol and adrenaline, to cope with the situation.

For individuals with emotional addiction, these hormonal spikes create a familiar "rush," similar to how a substance can produce a high. Over time, the brain becomes conditioned to seek these stress hormones, making calm, stable situations feel foreign and even uncomfortable. This neurological dependency is why some people find themselves gravitating toward high-stress environments or creating unnecessary conflict—because their brain has become addicted to the emotional spike.

Why Do People Develop Emotional Addictions?

Emotional addiction often stems from early life experiences, particularly in homes where chaos, conflict, or instability were the norms. When children grow up in environments filled with tension, their brains adapt to the frequent release of cortisol and adrenaline. As adults, these individuals may subconsciously replicate the chaotic patterns of their upbringing in their relationships or career choices.

For them, safe and stable environments can feel unfamiliar and even threatening because their brains associate emotional highs with connection and safety. The more predictable, calm states can feel dull, and they may unconsciously sabotage peaceful moments to return to what feels “normal.”

How to Break Free from Emotional Addiction

1. Set Boundaries with Triggers
One of the most important steps to heal from emotional addiction is learning to set boundaries. This may involve distancing yourself from people, environments, or situations that continuously trigger cortisol and adrenaline spikes. Whether it’s toxic relationships or highly stressful environments, removing these from your life is essential for healing.

2. Build Self-Awareness
Begin by noticing how you feel when you are in stable or calm environments. Do you feel an urge to disrupt the peace? Are you drawn to chaos or conflict? By recognizing these patterns, you can start to interrupt the cycle.

3. Embrace Stability Gradually
When stability feels uncomfortable, it’s important to expose yourself to it in small, manageable ways. Practice sitting with peace and calm without reaching for distractions or creating conflict. Over time, this will help your brain become more accustomed to calm, less chaotic situations.

4. Be Patient with Yourself
Healing from emotional addiction is a long process that requires patience and self-compassion. Your brain has been wired to respond to emotional highs, and it takes time to recondition it to find comfort in calm and safety.

5. Seek Therapy
Working with a therapist is an effective way to explore the deeper roots of emotional addiction. Therapy can help address unresolved trauma, identify emotional triggers, and rewire unhealthy patterns. By creating a supportive and therapeutic environment, you can work toward a more balanced emotional life.

The Impact of Emotional Addiction on Health

Beyond emotional consequences, emotional addiction takes a toll on physical health. Constant cortisol and adrenaline spikes can lead to chronic stress, which is linked to numerous health issues including high blood pressure, a weakened immune system, anxiety, and depression. Over time, living in a constant state of chaos prevents true peace and wellness, robbing individuals of the calm and balance that leads to long-term well-being.

Final Thoughts

Recognizing the signs of emotional addiction and understanding how it impacts your brain and body is the first step toward recovery. By setting boundaries, practicing self-awareness, and seeking help when needed, you can break free from the cycle of chaos and embrace a life of peace, stability, and connection.

Remember, you are deserving of a slow, steady, and nourishing life that fosters true emotional well-being. It’s time to release the need for crisis and embrace calm.

From our specialists in
Individual Therapy
:
Taran Scheel
Registered Social Worker, Psychotherapist
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Laura Fess
Registered Social Worker, Psychotherapist
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Jonathan Settembri
Registered Social Worker, Psychotherapist 
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Jessica Ward
Registered Social Worker, Psychotherapist
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Theresa Miceli
Registered Social Worker, Psychotherapist
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Michelle Williams
Registered Social Worker, Psychotherapist
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